Finding Confidence with Catia Holm
Catia Holm wants everyone to feel confident. She strives to “to encourage people to not only be their authentic selves, but to then take their authenticity and flourish.” After trying various careers including working as a restaurant/bar manager and working for her parents' business, she found her true purpose is to uplift others as they travel their life journey. Today, she does just that. Her positive attitude radiates through her writings which can be found on her blog, #ConfidenceRevolution. In addition to blogging she is an author, television personality, proud wife and mother. Here is some of her story:
What are three words that come to mind when you describe yourself?
Hard working, Kind, Evolving
It seems like you’ve had so many careers in your life, (managing the 5th street Eddie V’s, working for your parents) where did writing fit in or did it? When did it become a priority?
I have been writing and enjoying it since I can remember. My Dad was (is) a good writer and he taught me what he knew. We would spend hours crafting the perfect essays. I would write a draft, take it to him, he would give me constructive criticism and I’d go back and hone the piece. We’d do this 2 or 3 times until it was just right. And that set the writing style for my entire life.
In 2006 writing resurged as part of my life in the form of blogging. I had gone through a bad breakup and instinctively turned to pen and paper to try to figure out who I was and what I was feeling. After posting one or two vulnerable posts, friends started to write back to me and the thread woven through each messages was, “thank you for sharing, me too.”
Six years later after blogging as a hobby alongside my career, my then boyfriend and now husband asked me if I really wanted to be a writer. I told him I did and he replied with, “then you need to write.” He had written and published a book and knew the rigors it took to be a writer full-time, meaning how to write EVERYDAY, not just when inspiration strikes.
And so in September of 2012 I set some small goals, posted them on my wall and began writing daily, rain or shine. And then after building some discipline and feeling good about it, I had an idea for book – and that’s when my relationship with writing went to another level.
In the haze of new motherhood– I committed to writing for 60 minutes a day. I’d set the stopwatch on my phone and start and stop as many times as I needed to accomplish 60 minutes. I kept hard copy calendars on my wall where I would reward myself by shading out each day. (So tech savvy!) Eventually, the outline became chapters and the chapters became a book – me also morphing in the process.
That’s when spreading inspiration + hope became my career.
How do you define courage?
My favorite definition of courage is, fear walking.
I have learned to become comfortable with fear and uncertainty and regard myself as courageous in quiet ways. For me it’s never about proving others wrong, it’s about proving myself right, about pushing a little further. A courageous moment can be speaking my truth when I’m unsure how it will be perceived, or it can be jumping over a burning stack of wood.
About 10 years ago I read, Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway, by Dr. Susan Jeffers and her insight was my entrée into learning about fear and how to deal with it, and then when I read The Gifts of Imperfection, I really started to get comfortable with walking through fear and vulnerability into courage.
How did the idea for your #ConfidenceRevolution emerge?
After finishing the first draft of my book, The Courage to Become, Stories of hope for navigating love, marriage and motherhood. I sat with my Mom in my childhood home and thought of the themes running through the book. Some of the themes were hope, change, transition, and they all lead toward a more confident me.
Not that I had MASTERED confidence, but I had definitely done work on myself, sloughed off the unnecessary and really started to feel comfortable in my own skin. And I wanted to SHOW OTHERS HOW.
It was like I found a water well and I wanted to share the good news with everyone I knew.
It took me years of reading and learning and seeking to learn how to feel good about myself – and I wanted show others so that it didn’t take them as long. I wanted to show them the short cut to the water well.
So I looked up at my Mom and said, “We need a revolution, a confidence revolution!”
I didn’t do any research or lookup the hashtag or anything like that – I just knew – that was it.
I committed to a yearlong series and gave my readers all I could on growth, love, spirituality, communication – anything and everything that would help them feel GREAT about who they are.
If women feel good and deserving – so many of life’s troubles fall away. There are so many of us walking around feeling less than, and I want do my part to change that.
What do feel your gift to the world is?
Hope through seeming failure. I have learned and enjoy talking about the times I get it ALL wrong, about the times I stumble and about the times I could have done better – and crafting them into moments of hope for folks going through similar situations. Because, if I got through it, you can get through it too. God has given me the grace to share raw, vulnerable moments and still hold my head high.
What does self-acceptance mean to you?
Self-acceptance means not only being comfortable about who you are and your gifts, but relishing in it and celebrating it.
What is the most inspiring experience you’ve ever had or words you’ve ever heard?
I am motivated by the greater good. I am all about goodness and progress and team. So, the most inspiring words I’ve ever heard were spoken by Admiral William McRaven. He was speaking to the 2014 graduating class at The University of Texas.
Admiral McRaven’s graduation speech was about the lessons he learned during Navy Seal basic training.
Each point was wonderful, but my favorite was #10.
“Finally, in SEAL training there is a bell. A brass bell that hangs in the center of the compound for all the students to see. All you have to do to quit is ring the bell.
Ring the bell and you no longer have to wake up at 5 o'clock. Ring the bell and you no longer have to do the freezing cold swims. Ring the bell and you no longer have to do the runs, the obstacle course, the PT — and you no longer have to endure the hardships of training. Just ring the bell.
If you want to change the world don't ever, ever ring the bell.
To the graduating class of 2014, you are moments away from graduating. Moments away from beginning your journey through life. Moments away from starting to change the world — for the better. It will not be easy.
Know that life is not fair and that you will fail often. But if take you take some risks, step up when the times are toughest, face down the bullies, lift up the downtrodden and never, ever give up — if you do these things, then the next generation and the generations that follow will live in a world far better than the one we have today.
And what started here will indeed have changed the world — for the better.”
I loved his words so much I listened to them for HOURS during my first labor (which lasted 25 hours!). I also printed his words and have them taped to my desk. They bring me back to center when I feel like ringing the bell.
If you could tell your younger self something that you now know, what would it be?
Each of us are made uniquely for different purposes. I would tell my younger self that I have ALL that I need to live out my purpose and experience joy. I just have to tap into it.
Competition is an illusion. All of angst and suffering comes from attachment to form. And if we mirror nature, the way nature just IS, the way nature comes and goes, the ease and flow with which nature moves, there is more joy to be found in the day to day. We don’t have to fear being more or less or different, because it’s all an illusion. We’re all connected, we’re all just different colors in the same painting.
Kindness and honor are THE WAY. It took me a while to learn how to truly be kind and honor myself, but once I did – so many terrible habits went by the wayside and my life started feel lighter, more joyful, and I began to experience deep love and freedom.
Catia will be speaking at our Acceptance Tour in Austin on Monday, April 24th. She has recently completed her first book: The Courage to Become, Stories of hope for navigating love, marriage and motherhood.
For more information on Catia visit her links below.
Website: http://www.catiaholm.com/
Facebook: Catia Holm
Instagram: @catiaholm
Twitter: @CatiaHolm
Youtube: Catia Holm- YouTube